Willie & Joe

Willie and Joe are two of the most common names in the USA, but I would not be completely fair if I did not mention a cartoon by Bill Mauldin I saw during the Great War of 1939-1945. Two GI’s with beards were trying to sleep under one blanket amid the rubble of war. A big rat was standing on his hind legs on top of the blanket and one man’s toe. One of the GI’s was pointing a .45 pistol at the rat, and the other was saying, “Aim between the eyes. Sometimes they charge when they’re wounded.”

威利和乔是两个最常见的美国人名字。但为公正起见，我一定要提及在1939-1945世界大战期间由比尔毛丁创作的一个卡通故事。两个长着大胡子的美国兵在一堆废墟下裹着一条毛毯正在试图睡觉，发现一只大老鼠用两条后腿站在毛毯上，一只脚正踩在一个美国兵的脚趾上。两个美国兵中的一个用一只54式手枪瞄准那只老鼠，另一位美国兵说：“瞄准老鼠两眼正中，不然受伤的老鼠会对你进攻的”。

It would also be fair to ask, “How come you know so much about the spirit world?”

That’s a fair question. I have read a good bit on the subject, and I have had some ‘experiences’ that have left me certain about some things without being able to explain why I am so sure. What I ‘know’ seems to make more sense than all the stuff I have read and heard on the subject in 65 years of going to half a dozen different kinds of churches and listening to thousands of sermons. I have gotten tired of people trying to explain things to me that they don’t understand themselves.

人们也许会问，“你怎么会对神灵世界如此精通？”这是一个很公正的问题。我阅读过很多有关神灵的文章。我的一些“经历”让我悟出事物之真谛却无从解释为何我会如此自信。我“理解”的似乎比在过去65年中我在六个不同的教堂里听到的上千个训诫更有道理。我对那些自欺欺人的说教已深恶痛绝了。

Religion has done a lot of good in the world, especially when they talk about treating other people the way you would like to be treated yourself. But religious people have caused a lot of trouble when they insist that everybody believe, talk, eat, drink, smoke, sleep, dress, make love and act just like they do.

宗教对世界做过很多好事，尤其在教导人们应对待他人如同你期望别人对待你一样。但是当宗教的人们要求所有的人都向他们一样的信仰，言论，吃喝行睡，抽烟，穿着，作爱，众多麻烦就会从中而起。

If it turns out that I’m badly wrong about some of this, you are welcome to look me up and try to help me after we are sure. But please wait until we are both dead.

假如你确认我写的某些东西真的非常错误，欢迎指教。但请等到我们都到了天堂。

Background ‘Information’ About Spirits

神灵的背景

Somewhere, perhaps within the Milky Way Galaxy, and perhaps very far beyond, two spirits met. These encounters don’t happen frequently because of the vast size of the universe. As you know, spirits, not being confined by any bodily limitations, are able to travel anywhere they wish at the speed of thought.

在遥远的银河系的某个地方，两个神灵相遇了。由于宇宙之阔，两个神灵相遇的机会并不多。你知道神灵没有身体局限，可以用瞬想的速度穿行到宇宙的任何地方。

There are lots of spirits, many, many billions at least, but they are always busy, doing the things that spirits do, finding planets and other sites suitable for various forms of life, experimenting with farming, breeding, evolution and organizations.

宇宙间有很多神灵，至少成千上亿。但他们都在忙于神灵应该从事的实业-发现新的行星或其他天体以适应不同的生命形式，试验耕种，繁殖，进化，管理等等。

Because spirits without bodies have no need for air, water, food, shelter, etc., they are not dependent on each other like we are, but they do like to get together once in a while to shoot the bull and take advantage of the experience gained by other spirits, just like we do. They do it faster, because they don’t suffer from our language problems, and they don’t get upset when they learn something new.

虽然精灵无体，不需要空气，水，食物，及住宅，不象人类那样相互依赖，但他们仍然像人类一样愿意偶尔相聚，相互交流彼此的新经历。这些交流很顺捷，因为他们之间没有语言障碍，也从不会因为听到新鲜事而气恼。

Time doesn’t mean much to them personally, of course, but the experimental plots they are watching are very much time dependent. Particularly when new mutations of genes and new social experiments are first introduced, the plots need just the right amount of energy, fluids, nutrients and cultivation at just the right time, or they are likely to fizzle without ever being tried. So a spirit needs to watch his experimental plots pretty closely, and just take “time” for a bull session when he has something to report or needs to ask a question. They don’t use names, because there are so many of them. They recognize each other instantly by their genetic data strings, which they can read at a glance. Since I can’t read the data, I’ll call them Willie and Joe.

当然时间对神灵来说是无足轻重的，但他们所从事的试验项目却与时间息息相关，尤其当首次推出新基因变种和新社会试验时，这些构想需要在最佳时间给予恰到好处的能量，水分，营养，和培植，以避免死于萌芽。正因如此，神灵需要精心观测他的新构想试验，在需要汇报和提问题时，也要花时间吹吹牛，互相交流一下。因为神灵太多，它们不用名字。他们彼此可以略目各自的基因链即刻辨识对方。由于我无此能力，索性称他们威利和乔。

The Good War

有益的战争

Some time in the late 21st century, way out beyond the Milky Way, Joe meets Willie for the first time in 50 years or more and says, “Hey, the last time I saw you was when you were beheaded on TV. Where have you been since?”

二十一世纪的某一天，在银河系以外的某一个地方，乔与阔别50多载的威利第一次相遇。乔招呼到，“喂，上次见到你还是在电视上你被砍头的时候，发生了什么事？你都到什么地方去了？”

Willie answers, “I got fed up with the whole situation. My only reason for being there was to help those folks, and they just used me to make some silly public statement. I’ve been working over in Andromeda where I get a little more respect.”

威利回答到， “我被那桩事件作弄了。我卷进此事的唯一原因是要帮那些人的忙。他们只是用我作愚蠢的政治宣言。我现在在仙女座工作，那里我能得到多一点的尊敬”。

But Joe wants to know more. “When they held up your head for the camera, I said, ‘Hey, I know that guy.’ What was it like?”

乔想了解更多，追问到：“当他们把你的头对准摄像机时，我喊道， ‘喂，我认识那家伙’。当时你什么感觉？”

Willie shrugs. “No big deal. It only hurt for a few seconds. Nothing like the time I was burned at the stake by the Grand Inquisition. Other times I’ve been in bed for months, begging for morphine. But I’ve been out of touch. What happened after that?”

威利耸耸肩说，“没什么了不起，只痛了几秒钟。比起在大审判时受火刑烧烤时简直是小巫见大巫。那时我曾躺在床上数月祈祷用马啡因止痛。但从那以后我就离开人世，你知道以后发生的事情吗？”。

Joe smiles. “Well, it led to a pretty good war.”

乔笑道：“此后导致了一场有益的战争。”

Willie objects. “I’ve never heard of a good war. What do you mean?”

威利反驳道：“我还从未听说有什么有益的战争，你是指什么？“。

Joe had lived through it. “Well, the USA got steamed up like they were in 1942. They put a big tax on imported oil and used the money to build a fast interstate railway system. The high school and college kids all got bicycles, and the old cars were melted down to make war material. After a few years they got tired of killing and brought all the GI’s home. The War Department turned into a real Department of DE-fense devoted to the defense of all North and South America.”

乔是亲身经历过那场战争的。“嗯，美国象1942年那样头脑发热，它们将大量征收的进口石油税用来修建快速州籍高速铁路系统，高中生和大学生都骑自行车，旧汽车都被熔炼成战争武器。几年后，他们杀人杀厌倦了，将所有美国兵召回家。战争部变成了真正的国防部，用来防守整个北美和南美洲。”

Willie is not convinced. “Did the war settle any of the old feuds?”

威利仍不确信，问倒：“那场战争解决了任何老的争端吗？”

“Of course not. The killing just led to more killing like it always has. It was like another plague in Europe. After a third of the people were dead, those that were left became more valuable. They re-arranged the maps some and rebuilt the cities a little better just like they have for the last 10,000 years.”

“当然没有，与以往一样，凶杀只能导致令一场凶杀。简直就象另一场欧洲大瘟疫。当三分之一的人口灭绝后，剩余的人口变得更真贵了。他们就重新安排了版图，重蹈过去一万年的覆辙，把城市重建的略微好一点。”

Money─Should Be Crystallized Sweat

金钱-应当是汗水之结晶

Once every thousand years or so, two spirits will get together to compare their experiences. We are eavesdropping on one of their bull sessions.

每隔一千年左右，两位神灵就要相聚一次分享各自的经历。我们窃听到他们的一段吹牛对话。

Willie is saying, “I have lived several times now on that little planet with the Garden of Eden and all the wars, and they do come up with some cute ideas. Have you ever heard of MONEY?”

威利在说：“我在那个有伊甸园和许多战争的行星上已经生活过几次了。他们还真的想出了个伶俐的主意。你听说过‘钱’这个字眼吗？“

Joe is at a total loss.

乔被问得目瞪口呆。

“Well, it’s a sophisticated way of increasing prosperity by letting individuals do what they do best, and trading their labor with others who specialize in different things.”

“嗯，它是一种复杂的方式，通过允许每个人尽其所好来增加个人的财富，再通过商贸渠道来换取由其他特有专长人创造的不同产品。”

Joe says, “Oh yeah, that’s what we did on my Neanderthal tour. The women were seldom able to go hunting, because they were always pregnant or nursing. Most of the babies weren’t fit or lucky enough to grow up, so we had to have lots of them. I had to get in on five conceptions before I ever got big enough to hunt. There was plenty of excitement after that, though. You wouldn’t believe some of the game we tackled, working together. The gals kept the fires going, made the clothes, dried the meat, raised the kids and generally made life worth living.”

乔回道：“啊，对了，那正是我做穴居人时的情形。那时妇女们很少能外出打猎，因为她们不是在怀孕，就是在哺乳期。大多数的婴儿都不健壮或早逝，所以我们不得不生很多婴儿。我受胎了五次才最终长大到可以打猎的年龄。但从那以后生活充满激情。你不能想象我们在一起交锋过的游戏。女人们通常让火焰常燃，缝制衣服，风干肉食，养育孩子，使生活充满生机。”

Willie agrees, “That’s the basic idea, but in my tribe we had a guy who had lost a leg who got to be an expert at making arrowheads. He would trade three beautiful little flint tips for a dead rabbit, and he ate better than most of the hunters. He taught me how to make them, and I was able to travel hundreds of miles without taking time to hunt. The small ones were worth more than the big ones, because they took more time to produce, so I could travel light. Everywhere I stopped I could trade for food, clothes, shoes, and everything I needed.”

威利赞同的说，“那是基本的观念啦。在我们的部落里，有一位断了一条腿的家伙成了制造箭头的好手。他会用三只石头箭头换一只死兔子。他吃的比大多数猎人还好。他教会我作箭头，所以我能行遍百里不用打猎为生。小箭头比大箭头更值钱，因为制作小箭头要花费更长时间。所以我能轻装上阵。每停一站，我都能换取食物，衣服，鞋子，和任何我需要的东西。”

Joe is impressed. “Say, we could use that in the Andromeda Galaxy except that nobody hunts there. They are all vegetarians.”

乔被;深深打动。 “对呀，我可以在仙女座星系采取同样模式，只是那里没人打猎。他们都是食素的。”

Willie has the answer. “We didn’t stick with arrowheads forever. Several thousand years later I lived with a bigger bunch that used gold. We could travel even lighter, because gold is never found in large quantities. It takes a hundred times more work to round up an ounce of gold than it takes to make an ounce of arrowheads. It just takes a few thousand years to get general agreement that an ounce of gold is worth a month of food and lodging.”

威利有了答案。“我们并没有永远使用箭头。几千年以后，我生活在一个更大的群体中，他们用金子。我们可以更加轻装上阵了。因为金子更为稀少。提炼一盎司金子比制作一盎司箭头要费上百倍的力气。也只是经过几千年历史，人们就达成一盎司金子的价值相当于一个月食宿的共识。"

Joe is really fired up now. “I see. Money is just crystallized sweat. Say, we’ve got something like that gold stuff. I can’t wait to give it a try.”

乔此时真的动了真情，"我明白了，钱就是汗水之结晶。你看，我们也有类似金子的东西，我也等不及要试一下。"

But Willie is cautious. “There is still a problem. Later on we got carried away with traveling light and invented paper certificates and credit cards worth a hundred ounces of gold.”

但威利却提醒到："还有一个问题，在那以后，我们对轻装旅行过于热衷，又发明了价值几百盎司的纸币和信用卡。"

Suddenly Joe is concerned. “How do you keep people who haven’t made any arrowheads from printing papers that say they have?”

一时间，乔有些担忧了。"你们怎样保证那些还没有制造出任何箭头的人不去预先印纸币呢？"

Willie sighs, “Well, the government makes that a crime. The only trouble is that there is nobody to keep the government from giving away pieces of paper that nobody did any work for.”

威利叹了口气说："哎，政府将偷印纸币定为犯罪。问题是没人阻止政府乱发还没有人挣得的钞票。"

Joe is amazed. “Why would they do that?”

乔很是惊讶，"他们为什么这样做？"

“Sometimes the ruling class needs to make a good impression on the working people. If they have to win an election to stay in the ruling class, it’s a way to buy votes. I guess it’s better than the old system of kings.”

”有时统治阶层需要在工薪阶层面前留下好的印象。如果他们要想大选取胜，保持统治阶层的地位，这是拉选票的一个途径。我想这总比旧国王系统要好些吧。“

Joe is disappointed. “Sounds like you need an honest government.”

乔很失望，"听上去你们需要一个诚实的政府。"

Willie agrees. “Yeah, we’re working on that.”

威利同意地说："是啊，我们正在往这方面努力。"

The Human Spirit

人类的精神

It is difficult for spirits like Willie and Joe to be heard and taken seriously by “real, live people”, so sometimes, for their own special reasons they decide to live again.

For instance, Joe had once been a glider pilot and developed affection for buzzards. He decided to live among them for a while to enjoy soaring every day and eating meat without having to kill anything. He also wanted to teach the buzzards to drag the carcass off the highway where they could eat it without having to dodge the automobiles. He helped thousands of birds get to be old buzzards, but eventually a fast-moving sports car bumped him off while he was demonstrating the technique.

要让真正活着的人们听到象威利和乔这些神灵的建议并能认真对待是一件很不容易的事。所以有时为了他们特殊的原因，神灵们会决定下凡人生。比如乔就曾经投身成一个滑翔机飞行员，并对秃鹰产生好感。他决定与秃鹰们在一起生活一段时间，分享每天自由翱翔，食肉而不必杀生的生活。他还想教会秃鹰们如何将在高速公路上被汽车撞死的禽兽躯体拖到路旁食用，以免躲避来往的行车。他帮助了成千上万只秃鹰活到老年。最终，他还是在一次给秃鹰们作技术示范时，被一辆快速跑车撞出路外。

The idea is still getting around slowly, but Joe is satisfied and has moved on to other projects. He knows what many of us on earth are still learning, “There are no tragic endings for those who are doing the Lord’s work.” And furthermore, the Lord is not on any timetable. If something takes 600 years, that’s OK with Him.

这种观念仍在缓慢传播，但乔已经很满足，他已转向其他项目。他知道世上许多人仍然在学习的过程中。“对那些为上帝工作的人没有悲惨的结局”。不仅如此，上帝是没有任何时间表的。如果一件事情要花600年去完成，上帝是允许的。

We have just run across Willie talking to Mike, who has never lived before. Mike is full of big ideas about making a difference in the world, but thinks it would be good to get some practical advice from Willie, who is a veteran of many campaigns.

我们刚好碰上威利与从未降生过的麦克闲聊。麦克有一大堆如何改变世界的主意，但也考虑到，从威利那里得到些实用的忠告也无害处，威利毕竟是久经沙场的老将了。

Willie is saying, “I like your ideas and your enthusiasm, but the odds are long. You have to pick one baby at the moment of conception, and then you’re locked in through that kid’s whole career. You can study the DNA of both parents to improve your odds, but only one kid in fifty million gets to be a king or president who can make the kind of difference you have in mind.”

威利说：“我喜欢你的想法和热情，但你的成败难定。你必须在受孕那一霎间选择一个婴儿，然后你就被锁进那孩子的一生中。你可以研究一下父母双方的DNA来改进你的成功概率，但只有五千万婴儿中的一个孩子才会成为国王或总统，才会有你想象那种改变世界的能力。”

Mike is not discouraged. “I know the odds are long, but you can’t win the lottery without buying a ticket. I’ve got to start somewhere.”

麦克并不灰心，“我知道成败难定，但是不买彩票我就不会赢。我必须有个起始点呀。”

Willie takes a deep breath and settles in for the long haul. “Mike, most of the time you’ll be like the crew down below the water line, keeping the engine running, patching leaks, and pumping out the bilge water. The skipper can make heroic or stupid decisions, without ever asking you if they are right or ethical. He could operate for years, maybe for life, without ever knowing who you are and why you are there. Most of your time will be spent supervising a million chemical reactions every second, tracking down hostile life forms and chemicals, and repairing the damage they do before you find them. Once a month, if you’re lucky, the skipper will call you up on the bridge to advise him on a decision he is about to make. The rest of the time he will be thinking about food, comfort, sex and entertainment. If you have been able to turn him into a political creature, he’ll be thinking about re-election.”

威利深呼一口气，准备一场长谈。“麦克，多数时间你就象水线下的水手，不停地保持发动机转动，堵塞漏洞，泵出船底的漏水。船长可以做出英雄般的决策，也能做出愚蠢的选则，他没必要去咨询你是否正确或是否道德。做了多年船长，也许做了一辈子船长，他也不知道你是谁，你在船底干什么。大多数时间，你在每时每刻监督着成千上万的化学反应，跟踪敌意的生命形式和有害化学物，维修损伤以防大痪。如果幸运，每月你会被请到甲板上为船长即将要做的决定提建议。其余时间他会在想吃的，舒适，性，和娱乐。如果你能把他变成一个政客，他将苦思冥想如何再次当选。”

Mike understands. “Yeah, but as you say, there’s lots of time.”

麦克懂了。“是啊，不过你说过，时间有的是。”

Willie responds, “There’s lots of time only if you can keep him alive. I had just barely got started one time when my mother learned that the guy who promised to love her forever and never let anything bad happen to her did not have the guts to finish the job. She decided the two of us could make better use of the next 50 years with a husband and father. I agreed with her, and we both had better luck the next time.”

威利回答说：“只要你能保证他永远活下去，时间是有的是。当我刚刚事业起步时，母亲得知那曾海誓山盟永远爱她的男人没有勇气同她走完人生了，母亲决定，有一个丈夫，一个父亲，我们两人可以度过更好的下一个50年。我赞同母亲，我们后来的运气好多了。”

Mike is a little taken aback. “Well, at least you have had other chances, and your mother’s spirit was allowed to finish the job.”

麦克略为退防，“那么，至少你有另一次机会。你母亲的精神允许你完成了你的事业。”

Willie grins. “What you call finishing the job is no piece of cake. Life is a little bit like driving an old car across the desert. Old age, rust, wear and tear accumulates until you are stopping every few miles to repair something with chewing gum and bailing wire. The process is painful for your host, and you are torn between wanting to keep moving toward your goal and sympathy for the suffering it entails. It reaches a point where you run out of tools and materials anyway, and there is no choice but get out and walk. The old car turns back to dust or gets picked up by a scrap dealer and is turned into something new. For the spirits involved it’s all just a memory. Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.

威利苦笑道：“你所说的完成事业并非轻而欲举，人生就象在沙漠上开着一辆旧汽车，年老，生锈，磨损不断积累，直到你不得不每几英里就要停车用口香糖和铁丝修补零部件。这过程对主人是很困难的，你在是继续朝目的地前进还是伶悯随之而来的痛苦之间挣扎着。当你将最后的一只工具和材料都用尽的时候，你不得不下车徒步，那部旧车变成尘埃，或被收废铁人收回变成新东西。这里的精神也只化为回忆。正确的判断力来源于经验，经验则源于错误的判断力。”

Enthusiasia─The Benevolent World

热情之国-仁爱世界

Willie and Joe are watching a dentist examine a three-year-old girl, whose baby teeth are almost all rotted away. The dentist is explaining to the child’s mother that the decay was caused by the sugar that she put in the baby’s bottle over a long period of time.

威利和乔正在观察一位牙医给一个三岁大的小女孩检查牙齿，小女孩的乳牙几乎全被蛀蚀掉了。牙医对小女孩的母亲说，孩子的蛀齿是由于长期用奶瓶食用多糖食物的原因。

Joe is saying, “That’s the last straw. With all the trouble that can be traced to refined sugar, there ought’a be a law against it.”

乔说道，“那可是最后的